The Wisdom of Leaving
The thought of leaving your business can be very confronting, but making peace with this can open up the right path for you.
Annette sat in front of me, peering through the screen, with tears welling up in her eyes.
We had been talking about her future plans, and though it was clear that she was at the end of her path with her business, the idea of making that final exit was creating a very emotional reaction for her.
Of course it was.
Let’s not pretend these businesses are not our babies. They grew out of a heartsong, out of big dreams and the manifestation of the most valuable parts of ourselves.
We sweat bullets pulling them together. We went through so much, sacrificed so much, celebrated so much, and rode the rollercoaster of the entrepreneur many times over.
And somehow, this business evolved and grew into something beautiful, with its own unique edges and forms, and it became a thing. A thing to be proud of and to look upon lovingly as the manifestation of so much.
Of course it will be hard to leave.
Annette would be cutting a tie that would always be, in some way, tethered to her.
And she, along with so many other business owners who sat in the same position before her, would have to navigate what leaving means to her.
Leaving is defined in a few ways by the dictionary:
“depart from permanently”
“go away from without taking something with”
“abandon”
“cause (someone or something) to be in a particular state or position”
“let (someone) do or deal with something without offering help or assistance”
It’s no wonder we get a little misty and second-guess ourselves.
Leaving feels irresponsible, like giving up.
The words I’ve heard from my clients indicate disappointment in themselves, as if they should have been the ones to take their business to world domination.
As if they are admitting defeat by leaving. That they weren’t smart enough or savvy enough to figure out how to take their business from starting up to being an industry leader.
But truthfully, as is evidenced by the vast range of businesses available for sale at various stages of their lifecycles, businesses have rhythms and seasons. They have cycles of growth and they reach new stages periodically, at which point they need new strategies to continue their growth.
It is not realistic to expect that any business owner would be equipped or suited to lead their business through all of these stages of growth. Sure, some might be uniquely positioned to adapt and grow with the business, and I would argue that any business owner could continue to lead their business through long periods of growth with the right support but - more importantly - most business owners actually don’t want that.
By the time they are thinking of exiting, they have reached a stage in their business maturation where they are at their natural conclusion as its leader. They have either lost their passion with the current iteration or direction of their business or they don’t have the desire to lead something much bigger.
And that’s all OK.
That’s completely normal and natural, and I actually wish more business owners would recognize that. They could save themselves so much heartbreak, and allow their business to continue on its growth path under the leadership of the next right owner.
What’s on the other side of leaving?
Whatever you choose.
It’s completely normal to reach a natural end where your energy and enthusiasm is better channeled into a new venture, a new lifestyle or a new challenge.
When you can look at leaving as a totally legitimate and healthy strategy for you and for your business rather than a judgment on your capabilities or dedication, you may finally see so clearly where your path actually leads.
Back to Annette.
We talked at length and evaluated the pros and cons of an exit. We processed not only her strategic options, but also the emotions and beliefs associated with all the possible paths.
What finally came out was that she felt so disappointed in herself for walking away, but the truth was that she had nothing more to give. The business had evolved to a place that was healthy for the business but did not align with where her energy was strongest, and what she desired for herself and her own growth.
When we abstracted the business from being an extension of her as an individual and started seeing it as an asset, she could finally separate its path from her own, and they looked very different.
To soften the blow, we agreed on a timeline that felt not so far away that it wasn’t real, but far enough away that she felt she could put some very focused strategies (that we designed together) in place to grow the value of the business for an optimized exit.
This gave her a new focus and defined roadmap to an exciting new phase of her life, two years down the road.
Her energy perked right back up and she was able to throw herself into her preparations for her life post-exit, and for making her business the best it could be in its current iteration, and prepare it for its next phase of growth.
She made peace with leaving, and made peace with herself.